Thomas (not his real name) was born in a family of six children, five girls with Thomas the only boy. As he grew up he conducted himself as girl, putting on dresses, wearing girl’s shoes and putting on make up as his sisters did. At the age of four he joined primary school where he didn’t associate with fellow boys but rather girls, playing netball with them.
At the age of thirteen fellow pupils started discriminating against him. One time the boys ran after him and undressed him to see whether he was a girl or boy. When Thomas joined secondary school the discrimination began again because he played netball with girls, sat with the
girls in class and put make up on, but slept in the boys’ dormitory. The boys bullied him by hiding his belongings, such as his uniform, other clothes and books, telling him that some girls came and
took them.
At around 14 years old he developed feelings for fellow boys and men and by that time he had changed school to a single sex school for boys. Due to the fact that he grew up as a girl he felt that he was the only girl and feared getting closer to boys. But one day Thomas found friends who were like him, and fell in love.
After some time in his advanced level of school, Thomas’s family learnt about his orientation and
stopped paying his school fees because he was gay. They chased him from home, poured urine on him, denied him food and cut him off from relatives. His mother discommunicated him from the neighbours and insulted his boyfriends. Now, in public he does not feel free because of the way he dresses in tight jeans and make up, which he does because he feels that he is a woman.
Health challenges
At one time a boyfriend of Thomas infected him with gonorrhoea so Thomas decided to go to the health centre for treatment. When he reached the centre and met the doctor he openly said he was gay and that his boyfriend had infected him with an STD. The doctor didn’t treat him there, instead he referred him to a clinic to buy expensive drugs. Thomas didn’t finish the course and the infection continued, so he tried to approach the doctor again for alternative medication. The doctor made him wait the whole day at the health centre until the rest of the clients had gone, and then asked him huge amount of money for treatment.
Thomas says health workers don’t keep patient information confidential because when he went for HIV testing and counselling he told them that he was gay. The counsellor wrote on his referral paper to the laboratory that he was gay and a woman. Thomas got annoyed at this and left without testing. He still has not been tested because of the stigma he faces from counsellors.
Thomas concluded his story by appealing the government to include treatment for lesbian, gay, transsexual, bisexual and intersexual people (LGTBI) on their health programmes like they do for other groups. He points out that LGTBI people become ill too, like any other people, and society should be sensitized about gay lifestyles, the dangers of stigma and homophobia, and to encourage families to accept them.
